Money – NaPoWriMo – Day 7

Oh to be wealthy
Value measured by money
Drowning life’s meaning

Suffused with more than your share
Power and hope in despair

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Today’s prompt – money!

And to add some extra flavour, I have chosen to write a Tanka – not a form I have used before. Does it work?

(Updated the third line to a better flow I think! – thanks to Elizabeth at : 1sojournal)

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© Copyright 2015 Robin McShane
As per this blog’s copyright statement

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10 comments on “Money – NaPoWriMo – Day 7

  1. I always think of those Japanese forms as rich in concrete images. This one is all abstract nouns and verbs….but then, money is an abstraction, isn’t it…

    Gertrude Stein said: “Money is always there. Only the pockets change. It is not in the same pockets after a change. And that’s all there is to say about money”. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thanks for your comment Cynthia – I will have to work on my concrete Images! I Like the Gertrude Stein quote! 🙂
      I must just add that my research was not very helpful to me regarding the Tanka – so I was ‘shooting in the dark’ a little here. Your input thus much appreciated Cynthia – thanks!

      Like

  2. Like the poem and the point you are making. The third line, however, seems a bit forced. I know this is a syllabic form. Perhaps “drowning life’s essence” or something similar. Check a thesaurus maybe?

    Elizabeth

    Liked by 1 person

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